Tired

So very tired, and so very sore. Not the good kind, lol.

Especially like this i need to watch my focus and concentration - and my temper,so that i do not show disrespect by accident.

Giggles - it is my blog after all

It is okay

It is okay to cry when you are in pain, and it is okay to express that you are in pain. Guess what i am in pain. A ice pack and a few pain killers later i am less pain. i did say i work and work hard and after 12 days in row, i am a bit sore and tired. The tears helped me to feel some release from the mental tension, and now the physical is more tolerable. i am home with my Dominates, loved and safe.

Smiles

i know i have days i rock at posting and other days i am horrible at it, some of it is rl work. i work and i work hard at my job. So please a little leniency there. Secondly this is rl - i live rl in my submission which means i am learning and growing as i talk with Y/you here. When i have issues, i tend to withdraw from the world. i get quiet, and i get sulky. It is a bad bad habit and one i am learning to correct. i have had a rocky few weeks. So with that, i do apologize.

i am a creature of habit, and those habits can be very hard to break. i still wake up every morning, and i know where my heart is, and Who has my soul. i go to bed every night knowing that same knowledge. That is the most beautiful thing ever.

Remember

While i talk a lot about how we have a duty to our Dominates - They also have a duty by us. Don't forget that. we trust Them to care for us, to have our needs - not our wants - but needs in consideration. They give us something we need and crave - but we also give Them a huge gift - ourselves.

The relations - for some the word dynamic - is something beautiful, not something to be entered into lightly or on a whim.

Something to think of for A/all of U/us.

Frustrating

i am one of those who are locked inside my head, and i will actually act out to keep others away from the emotional side of me. my Dominates, love me so much - that She will actually piss me off to get me to suddenly give a voice to those thoughts. i hate admitting that i do that, because as i learned yesterday it is a form of topping. Emotions are hard to work through, it is hard to admit to ones Dominate that you are angry at them, that your feeling did get hurt because you took something said the wrong direction. ...

That leads straight to COMMUNICATION - They are not mind readers, and They want to know those emotions, those deep thoughts that go unexpressed - because you are Theirs, and in my case They love me. i need to let go and fully love. i need to feel, i need to express, and i need to release whatever it is that i keep blocked in. (LOL - unfortunately sometimes, most of the time  i am not entirely sure until after the fact)

Smiles

E/everyone has good days and bad days - and off days. Currently my days are learning to leave work at work, Walk out the door and work issues stay put, home life takes over. Vice Verse. To think i would have this down now, but i am learning management in the matter of days. my brain is full, but my Dominates are more important. i walk from that door, i am entirely Theirs. my focus needs to shift from work to Home.

Think on that, because it will help you immensely to learn and being to practice.

WOOTS!!!

So happy to be back at work, and working on everything with Bliss Temple of Sin and BToS Radio - seriously if Y/you haven't checked it out Y/you should.

Remember to show and tell your Dominates how much They mean to you. They need some appreciation and love as much as you do.

Focus

Focus is something is easy to lose if one is still learning to keep it. i am in training and many times i need to redirect it. i know a lot of these posts have been on it, but please realize just how important it is to have.

It is so easy to misdirect it or justify that it was correctly placed when you are in error. Things like i was doing the task You asked of me, or but this is my job that i do everyday or You - do not matter.

If your Dominate wants your attention no matter what you are doing at that time - whether for Them or not. Then at least acknowledge Them and attend to Their needs. Remember submissive - not top.

Yawns

Up early for work - huge yawn - 6am shift today.

One thing to always keep in mind, no matter how tired one gets is focus. Redirect that focus a million times if you need to, but your Dominate when with Them comes first. It is easy to think that you are focused truly on Them when doing a project for Them - but if your not listening to what They are saying .. then you are not really focused on Them but the project instead.

Thoughts to think on and remember.

WOOTS!!!

Back at a job that i enjoy with people i enjoy - it is like a work family. So happy, and They are happy i am happy. Smiles...

Runs around Singing

i love it when i am focused and i think They love it too. my crash and burn epic problem a few days ago, really got through to my head.

Best advice that took me how long to get through my skull - learn and move forward.

Smiles

Sometimes it takes the hard way to wake a person up to what they have. i happen to excel at the hard way, but at a epic scale. Forget the little piddle stuff, if i am going to mess up - i mess up.

i am the luckiest girl in the world because, They are right there to help me out. i love Them so much!